Webster defines joy as “a very glad feeling.” Theologians, as usual, complicate things by splitting joy in two: sensible joy and intellectual (spiritual) joy.

Sensible joy is easy to describe. Think of finishing your favorite meal done just the way you like it, or hearing your favorite song by the original band, or the smell of lilac on a sunny spring day. Joy may be either the action itself (the tasting, seeing, feeling) or the pleasant state that accompanies the achieving of this good thing. (This is the stuff we did for five years in the seminary!)

Spiritual joy is different. It may have similar feelings attached to it (gladness, cheeriness) but it goes deeper than something pleasing to the senses. It has its origin in an awareness of a “Good” that has been obtained through virtuous action.

For example swimmers exert themselves for months to train for the big meet. They experience joy when they see their efforts have paid off with their best time ever. The joy is in the awareness . . . “do you see what you have done? Your hard work has really paid off. You really are a fine swimmer! Let’s celebrate!!”

OR, you stuck with someone who was going through a hard time. Everyone was down on this person and any- one who hung out with them (you). You resisted all urges to run away and you never wavered in your friendship. Suddenly you both realize that this is what friendship really means. This is a joy!

Spiritual joy usually comes with some effort of the will, some “doing the right thing”. With little effort there is little joy.

So what are your moments of joy? Of laugh out loud happiness? A sense of wonder at this world’s beauty so strong it makes you choke up? Here’s a few of mine. What are yours?

Moments of Joy:

• Playing high school sports. There were moments when the joy of physical exertion and teamwork were indescribable.
• 21 yrs old. Standing on the 17th tee at Durand Eastman, suddenly knowing that Rochester is where I want- ed to live my life. (How did I know? I just did.)
• Handel’s Messiah. Pure joy. Also Samuel Barber’s “Adagio”. I can die in peace.
• A dream I had about God a long time ago. I can still feel what it was like.
• The change of seasons brings joy (and a sweet sadness sometimes which is a weird kind of joy too).
• Many memories of friends and their great kindnesses.
• The times (there have been many) of uncontrollable, fall on the ground, close to tears, laughter.
• Being a priest and seeing the Faith that crosses your face.
• Watching children be children. (A nine year old girl’s giggle . . . how can there not be a God?!).
• Knowing (because Christ said so) that it’s all going to turn out all right. Love wins. Darkness and hatred are on the losing team. Let’s spend this life doing the things He asked of us. This purpose in life brings joy.

Of course all moments of joy are simply a foretaste of the joy the Lord created us to experience . . . . the vision of the limitless beauty and goodness of God.

“Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has it entered the mind what God has prepared for those who love Him.” 1 Cor. 2:9

Two weeks to go ……… wait ……………. Pray.

Fr. Tim

Advent (from the Latin, ad venio) means “to come” or “the coming”. It is a time when we begin to watch for something that we’re told is coming toward us. But for now . . . it’s not here yet.

This creates a tension that most of us don’t like. My eye wants to see “it”. The act of looking is a search for an object to lock onto. But when I look – – it’s not there.

So what do we do? If it’s important enough, we keep looking, which then becomes waiting. Waiting is not our favorite thing. We’ve tried over the past thirty years to do away with as much waiting as possible. Think of it: instant coffee, microwave cooking, fast food, 4G hook-ups, bar codes, email, computer banking, speed dating, etc. etc.

Ask any systems engineer and they will tell you that waiting is wasted time. It’s bad business. Time is money.

Then right in the middle of the busiest time of the year we have this totally contrary message from the Church. She tells us to “prepare”, to “expect”, to “hope for”, yes, to “long for”. Waiting is good she tells us. It’s a sign of love. We wait expectantly for that which we love.

And isn’t it the case that those things which are most precious are just the ones that cannot be hurried? Let’s be honest, waiting requires patience (Latin, “pati” – to suffer). Ask an expectant mother what waiting is all about.

There really is no other way to spin it. It takes endurance, strength, and forbearance to remain in a state of expectation. It stretches us. Proves our perseverance and our trust in that which is “coming”.

So what do we “do” in this time of waiting? A few suggestions:

• Be patient in whatever line you find yourself in (Hegedorns, DMV).
• Be kind to whoever is attending your line. –Drive friendly.
• Say your prayers in the morning (add about 2 minutes to just stare out your window.)
• Think of someone who’s having a hard time right now. Say a prayer for them.
• Give some money away.
• Reflect on a particular bad habit of yours. Use it to remind yourself to be patient with others.
• Take a ride in the country.
• Pray for loved ones lost.
• Help a young person believe in themself.

–Trust God to bring His good purpose to our human affairs.

God loves you. You are His child.

A Blessed Advent Sunday.
Fr. Tim

So here we go . . . the mad dash to Christmas. I’m sure you saw the pictures of people (perhaps you were there yourself) waiting in line to begin shopping.

Adding to the frenzy is the dismantling of the firewall around Thanksgiving. This holiday has traditionally been most pristine in observing family traditions — the parade, visits to grandparents, football, the table, the turkey, the prayer (“okay everybody say what they’re thankful for.”)

Not anymore. It’s just like any other day now. “Stores are open for your shopping convenience. Get a head start on your Christmas gift list. Have that turkey, then join us for our huge holiday savings!” One poor fellow was quoted in the paper, “I know it’s Thanksgiving but I have to buy my kids some stuff.”

Somehow we’ve gotten things out of order. The tail is wagging the dog.

There’s a remedy for this. It’s called Advent. These next four weeks are a time of waiting, reflecting, praying. It is a time where, with God’s humble birth soon to come, our hearts can soften and a freshness to life be restored. It is a joyful time of expectation. Advent is sort of like that happy buzz in the theatre while everyone waits for the curtain to go up.

So how can you celebrate “waiting”? What rituals help us understand “expectation”? Advent helps us experience what we call “less”. Or another way to express it . . . “without”. Here are some suggestions to help your Advent waiting. (I don’t mean to sound like a Grinch here but I think these will help prepare for the great Feast of Christmas).

Avoid the “Christmas Specials” on television . . . the ones that have Santa and huge happy endings with everyone singing and clapping. It’s not Christmas yet.

Avoid listening to the popular carols (Jingle Bells, We wish you a Merry C, Joy to the World, Silent Night, etc.). Christ hasn’t come yet. Handel’s Messiah is great Advent music.

“Small”, “Quiet”, “Slow” are good. (Big, Loud, and Fast tends to get us tense and anxious.)

Red and gold throughout the house says Christmas . . . try silver, blue and purple during Advent. I sound like Martha Stewart!!

“Secrets” are great ways to prepare for the Christ Child. Do something really nice for someone. Do it in such a way that they will never discover you were the one who did it!

Lower your expectations. This will NOT be. .“the best Christmas ever!” It will be good and holy in just the way God wants it to be for you . . . if you practice the Advent spirit.

Teach the children/grandchildren to appreciate the small and humble way God chose to come to us. Find some small little task to do with a child to “get ready” for the Feast. (Bring your child to church during the week; light a candle for someone they choose and say a prayer).

Sadness often comes at Advent. We’ve all suffered some loss that the season puts us in touch with. Let any Advent sadness we have soften our hearts for others. There is always someone who suffers more than me. Pray for them in the midst of your sadness.

You are your best gift to others. You can bring a new freshness to your affection for people. Let yourself be renewed by the wonderful quiet and smallness of Advent.

Go slow. God bless you!

Fr. Tim

I’m thinking of a spiritual lesson I’ve had to learn over and over in my life. It’s the simple fact that God wants all of me.

There’s a tension here. Everything I have has been given to me: parents, siblings, personality, talents . . . all gifts. The problem is I forget my very existence is given to me by God. I start thinking I’m in charge. It’s MY life. . . and I’ve got plans for me.

All this can work well so long, as my father used to say, “It squares with the Home Office”. In this case that’s God!

Chaffing under these limits to freedom, don’t we try to strike a deal with God? “Look Lord, I’ll keep the 10 Commandments as best I can, Mass on Sunday when schedules permit, and, what the heck, I’ll throw in a few bucks for the CMA.”

“But . . . don’t ask me to give you my habits or my preferences. I’ve spent a lifetime developing them: my bedtime, my cocktail, my personal time, a particular hobby, etc., all these are mine. I’ll do what I want with them.” “Got a problem with that?”

So God is patient. He lets us have our way. But see what happens. Habits and preferences (even the good ones) start to protect themselves. To the point where they start to run the show. We start living in a way that expects our habits to have no interference. (“What do you mean the plane is delayed?” OR “No coffee!!? That’s impossible!” OR “Take a walk? Can’t you see the Bills game is on?”)

Once again God lets us have our way. And I don’t know about you, but every time I start thinking “I’m a good guy–I don’t need God’s will to tell me what to do”… things get muddy.

It’s weird. I start out wanting a little “life for myself”. God won’t mind. And now I discover there’s a growing part of me that doesn’t want God interfering with my habits at all.

And look what’s happened to God. God becomes “the Law”, the cop in my rearview mirror. Our loving Creator is now a kill joy, someone to flee.

Poor God. How we twist things about Him. How we make Him out to be some grumpy boss who loves to order people around. Our vision of life slowly changes. Happiness is something to be grasped by ourselves. God is someone to flee. Adam and Eve hid themselves.

So what went wrong? We did. We failed to give God everything. Call it what you want . . . mistrust, selfishness, pride, arrogance . . . it’s all the same. It’s a voice that says, “NOBODY IS GOING TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO.” Quietly God calls to us but we’re not in the mood to listen.

Ever have that feeling? Ever hear yourself saying that? Welcome to this fallen world.

We’ve forgotten that God loves us. We’ve forgotten that, in His knowing love, He knows us better than we know ourselves. (If God had granted every wish or prayer I’ve made, I dread what I would have become!) And, get this.

God’s will is our true happiness! St. Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Jesuits, prayed this prayer (The Suscipe) for God to have all of him. See what you think.

Take, O Lord, and receive my entire liberty, my memory, my understanding and my whole will. All that I am and all that I possess, Thou hast given me: I surrender it all to Thee to be disposed of according to Thy will. Give me only Thy love and Thy grace; with these I will be rich enough and will desire nothing more. Amen.

Next Week Advent. We start all over!

Fr. Tim

It’s strange. Something that gives me comfort in the midst of our current world and national turmoil is the realization that some things are just out of my control. I’m not off the hook by any means. I must do my part. But how this all turns out – – – that’s in God’s hands.

So what are those issues that cause you to wonder just where this world is headed? What keeps you up at night worrying about the future your child or grandchild will experience?

I’ll bet it’s one of these:

• The possible impeachment of our president . . . and the radical polarization of the American people to- ward each other.
• The critical issue of foreign interference in our elections past and future.
• The serious instability of Mid-East nations – Syria, Iran, Ukraine.
• The nearly 3 million refugees currently seeking safety from corruption, war and hopeless poverty.
• Our broken immigration policy at the Southern Border and the haunting vision of parents and children being separated.
• The growing breach between rich and poor. (3% of the world’s population holds 85% of the world’s wealth.)
• Can we add . . . the Opioid Crisis, the Catholic Clergy Abuse Scandal? . . . and just for fun let’s throw in Global Climate Change.

Each one of these problems taunt us with their seeming insolvability. So what are we to do? Is there some foothold that stops this downward spiral? Has God abandoned us?

No. He has not abandoned us. And yes, He gave us foothold, (actually a rock!) against which “the jaws of death will not prevail.” Mt. 16:18. It is the rock of Jesus Christ and His Gospel.

And what does this gospel say about all our troubles? Several things. First we ought not be surprised by the problems of life and human history. Jesus tells us, “In the world you will have trouble. But take courage. I have overcome the world.” Jn. 16:33.

That’s it in a nutshell really. God’s plan for the world has already been secured. He has overcome the world by Christ’s death and Resurrection.

There is no power on earth that can overcome the will of God to save the human race. Period.

The future (though there will be suffering along the way) has been won. Think of it. All the forces of darkness and sin gathered in one horrible day, and killed the King of Love. In fact the enemy of Christ is still at work in the world (see the list above). But it’s a losing battle . . . the love of God is the supreme and final reality. Death is overcome by a Love that is God Eternal.

However . . . the story (with its victorious ending) isn’t over. It needs you and me to do our duty. The final end of history will not happen without our imperfect cooperation. God wants us to share in the story He’s already completed! “Seek first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness. Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.” Mt. 6:33, 34.

This is a real act of Faith, isn’t it? (We don’t have the slightest notion of how this will turn out – only that God’s plan wins.) To trust in a victory that’s already happened; but one I cannot yet see. This Faith brings about the second great virtue – – Hope. (Read the beautiful passage of St. Paul in Romans 8:18-25), “And so we boast of the hope we have of sharing God’s glory . . . and this hope does not disappoint (in spite of life’s sorrows) for God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, who is God’s gift to us.” Romans 5:5.

We never give up hope. Never! Why? Because Christ has won the victory. Human history will complete itself in God’s good time. And when it does, you, who have longed for its coming, you battle scarred and wounded faithful, you will shout for joy.

Let us each do our part.

Fr. Tim

Every once in awhile it helps me to go back to some of the theological books I collected in seminary and early priesthood. There I find in writing some of the “fundamental principles” that help explain the Christian Faith. Words that define realities like “person”, “truth”, “guilt”, “love”, “spirit”, “history”, etc.

Let’s look at one of these defining principles . . . . Freedom. What is freedom exactly?

For a twelve-year-old mind, freedom means “staying up late ‘cause there’s no school tomorrow!” Or . . . summer vacation starts this Friday! Or . . . no homework. For a child, freedom means “not having to do something”, which thereby makes them free to do whatever they want. In fact, we all have this initial experience of being “set free”.

On closer look however, things go much deeper. Human freedom is what sets man apart from everything else in creation. Think of it. Every creature you see, whether (as we used to say) animal, vegetable, or mineral, is harnessed to a natural order which totally determines what it becomes.

The flowers in spring, the geese flying south in a wing, that stone at the end of your driveway, are all part of a natural order. This “order of nature” requires flower, goose, and stone to act in a particular, predetermined way in order for them to be what they are. (Beware! The goose that stops by your kitchen to have coffee with you is really not a goose!).

Isn’t this fun?!

The human being however is a different creature. We are set in “openness” to becoming. (It’s like we’re driving a convertible with the top down . . . while the rest of nature drives a hard top with the windows closed!)

That means we must discover the character of our nature – – – who I am. Our freedom is not “freedom from” but freedom “for”. We are summoned by our freedom to action that defines us as we go. We become “truth tellers” or “generous” or “patient” or “forgiving”.

Or, equal in possibility, we can become “liars”, “greedy”, “unforgiving”, etc. It’s up to us. We’re free. This is the wonderful dignity of the human being as created by God. God has made us, in effect, co-creators of ourselves. Our actions put into history who we are. We “become”. And because it was done in freedom . . . we become “responsible for it”.

Some people don’t like this. The responsibility that weighs on every human to create for themselves their own character and to stand by that as defining who they are . . . is too heavy.

“I just wanna be. I’m the boss. I say what I want to do. And, oh by the way, nobody tells me who I am or what I should become.”

Now here’s the kicker . . . Don’t miss this. Our human nature, as created by God, is to share in His nature! God created us to have His love as our meaning.

We know this because God has revealed it to us in Revelation (Sacred Scripture). What does the bible tell us about ourselves?

1. We are made in God’s image and likeness (Genesis).
2. We are God’s children. 1 John3: 1-3 “But it is not yet clear what we shall become . . . but we know when Christ appears (the Day of the Resurrection) we shall become like him, because we shall see him as he really is.”
3. Ireneaus said it centuries ago; “the glory of man is to see God.”
4. The purpose of the gift of freedom is to one day share in the nature of God…. that is a share in the pure, selfless, joyful, eternal giving of Himself in the relationship of the Trinity. God has a place for us in the Trinity!

So back here on earth – – – what are we to do with our freedom? Love God with all our heart. And love our neighbor as Christ has loved us.

Let’s get to work!

Fr. Tim

There is a teaching in Catholic Moral Theology, rooted in the bible, that tells us we have an obligation to let our neighbor know when they are committing sin. It’s called Fraternal Correction and the obligation occurs first with those who we know to be Christian and hold the same principles of behavior as we do.

Scripture says in effect we are doing them a favor. The hope is they recognize their failure and return to right behavior. By this, you have saved your brother/sister. To remain silent, is an offense against them.

Now some of us respond to this injunction more vigorously than others. They like to correct people. The problem is sometimes we do the “correcting” behind their back in conversation with others. Jesus addressed this when he advised us to take the log out of our own eye first, then we would see clearly to help remove our neighbor’s splinter.

Others of us (perhaps most) are inclined to “just go along”. We close our eyes to the bad stuff happening around us. We don’t want to “get involved”. “It’s none of my business”. This is what happens to me and I bet to you too.

So how do we do the right thing here? How do I know when to speak out and when to remain silent? Certainly the gravity of the situation would require us to act. Serious danger to innocent persons, great scandal to children, a major injustice or unfairness, observed cruelty to others . . . all require us to step forward to witness to goodness, to protect innocence. I think most of us see our duty here. With God’s help let us be up to the test.

But there is something else happening here. You see, along the way of “correcting” someone, we can often end up “judging” them. It is at that point we’ve gone too far, for judgment belongs to God. It can be hard to distinguish between the two (judging/correcting). Let’s see if we can find some guidelines.

–To tell my co-worker that he has his facts wrong or his statement is inaccurate – is correcting. –To say “you’re lying” or “you’re a liar” — is judging.

–To encourage someone to not give up or to “keep on trying” is a way to correct. To call them a lazy quitter is to judge.

–To stress the value of dressing with modesty is correcting. To call someone a tease is judging.

It would seem if there is a name attached to the behavior one is concerned about, chances are I’m judging another person.

So why can’t we judge people? Because we just don’t know the reasons why people do the things they do or the desperate situations in which they must choose. And lacking that knowledge, the goodness or evil of their actions is known only to God. (Remember the woman caught in adultery? “Has no one condemned you?” said Jesus. “Nor do I. Go and avoid this in the future.” This was correction not judgment.)

One key that helps a bit is to try as St. Paul says to “bear with one another”, to accept people as they are with certain weaknesses and faults. Not that we close our eyes to wrong doing, but that we “love the sinner”.

It’s love that brings someone to their senses, not judgment.

Blessings on your week.

Fr. Tim

Years ago there was a home visit in the parish I’ll never forget. I was bringing Holy Communion to a couple in their 80’s. The husband was bed ridden so we said our prayers bedside and they took the Host.

Afterward the Mrs. invited me to their overheated living room to “chat a bit”. Some minutes into our first-time introductions, she asked me, “Do you want to see my braid?” “Excuse me?”, I said. “My braid, I’ve saved my hair.”

So what does one say? “Sure. Let me see your braid.” In a flash she sets a handsome mahogany box on the table. Lined in red velvet, the box contained what looked like a thick dark brown rope about the size of a braided garden hose. It was the hair of a young woman. Her mother had insisted that scissors not touch her hair from birth to her 18th birthday. This box contained the beautiful hair of her youth.

She smiled remembering how she looked with that beautiful auburn hair.

My point? There are some things we should never let go. Some things are so precious that they continue to feed us, inspire us, touch us, long after the actual event.

We talked last week about scars and the painful memories they can bring and how God can use them to bring about character and compassion for others. So too, we each have unforgettable memories that make us smile, that warm our hearts, that make us proud. God gives these to us as our very own treasure chest.

He wants us to open it often and remember the wonderful work He let us be a part of. Why? So that we become aware of the goodness of God in our life! So that we can “connect the dots” and find God present to us in the people and events of our life.

So what’s in your treasure chest? Mine? Here’s a couple of mine:

• Our screened in porch and garden growing up.
• My dad reading the newspaper at night in his chair.
• Senior year basketball. Beating Gilmore Academy in triple overtime.
• A moonlit walk with a first love. Fifty years ago. (pretty corny, eh?!)
• My sweet sisters constantly forgiving me for my unkindness.
• A tree, where God sat me down and let me know He was with me.
• Friends who love me and still talk to me after many years!
• The grace to walk away from a harmful habit.
• Some genuinely holy people who have graced my life.

All these cause me to pause, to remember God’s invisible hand guiding me in my life.

Your homework? Think back. Find your moments and . . . Give Him Thanks.

Bless your week.

Fr. Tim

PS. Remember God is not done with you yet. Keep your eyes open.

I’m told that if you travel to Elmira and stand at the main downtown intersection you will see a line on a limestone building (up about 15 feet) that marks the level the floodwater reached in the flood of 1972. All you need do to remember that terrible event is look up on the side of that building.

Scars. They serve as reminders of events long past. I had a broken front tooth served up by my sister swinging a bucket of water (sorry Patty!). We all have physical reminders of bumps, scrapes, and collisions. (Mothers have reminders of their pregnancies.) They don’t hurt any- more but they bring the event back to memory.

You know where I’m going with this right? Yes, there are emotional scars too. Sometimes a place or picture or person can bring back an event that we can still feel. (A couple of swimming episodes in my youth still cause anxiety whenever I’m in water over my head). There are, of course, “good scars”, unforgettable moments of joy or peace. We’ll talk about those next week.

Some of those emotional scars go deep into the psyche and subconscious mind. They create vague, hard to explain motives for our reactions to things. Counselors, psychologists, and spiritual directors help us locate “our issues”. Things like: authority, intimacy, commitment, trust, addictions, can all be affected by emotional scars.

So what are we to do with these “visitors from the past”? Wise spiritual counsel says to be aware of them. “Know your demons”. Facing these things honestly, sometimes with the help of trained professionals, can keep them from immobilizing us.

Christian Faith assures us that we are not “defined” by our scars. In other words, what we are is given to us by God and will never be taken away. Our ultimate purpose as Children of God is to receive the love of God (eternal life) and to know and love God in return.

There is no scar, no fear, no devil that can rob us of this dignity. Parents, you especially understand this in your love for your children. Wherever they may be . . . at home, at work, in hospital, in jail, wherever . . . they are always your child. Even in hell (God forbid) I would be God’s son.

So what does this mean for scarred, addicted, fearful humanity? It means that NOTHING can change what God wants for me as his child. In fact our very wounds can become the thing that God uses to show us His love. (I’ve heard people tell me their sickness/addiction is the very thing God used to touch their hearts.)

St. Paul says it beautifully (I quote at length): “We know that all things (even our scars) work for the good for those who love God and who are called according to his purpose. . . . If God is for us, who can be against us? What will separate us from the love of Christ? Anguish?, Distress?, Persecution?, Peril?”

“No! In all these things we conquer through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor present things (scars!), nor future things, . . . nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8: 28-39.

So what does this mean when my demon memories come calling? It means I don’t have to run and hide. It means I have that scar; no denying it. It means I am more than what has afflicted me. But what has scarred me can, by God’s grace, help others to bear theirs.

“Peace be with you.” Jesus said. “Then he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples rejoiced.” Luke 24:40.

Love bears all things. Love never fails.

Fr. Tim

The fear of embarrassment causes more people to shut down and hide than nearly any other experience. To feel totally exposed to strangers, or those closest to us for that matter; there’s nothing quite like it.

Think of those times when fear of embarrassment took hold of you. How about: singing at mass, dancing while sober, holding hands, taking your drivers test, speaking a foreign language, getting your tax filing audited, asking someone out for the first time, that first kiss . . . and the greatest fear of all? Public speaking.

There’s a ton of them.

And what is it that grips us so tightly, that freezes us up? I think it’s the possibility of being laughed at, ridiculed or rejected. In that scary moment we’re just “out there”, unguarded, vulnerable. The slightest smirk, or roll of the eyes means total rejection. We’ve all experienced it and we never want it to happen again.

It’s why children stop acting like children. Their free, silly, exuberance has met disapproval. “There must be something wrong with me” is the message we get. And so we begin to protect ourselves (a necessary adjustment to life at times). But it can come at a cost of never investing ourselves in what we truly believe. We can turn our back on things dearest and most important to us.

Why did Peter deny the Lord three times? (One of them to a little servant girl!) (Luke 22: 54-62). He was scared and embarrassed. We all know the feeling.

Parents and grandparents are expected to get over this fear . . . if only for the sake of children and spouse. You are supposed to be bigger than your fears (or at least be willing to confront them) for the sake of what you love and hold true.

But still the feelings of embarrassment harass us. As a priest I see it when it comes to speaking about your faith in God. Many have gotten away from the religion of their youth (when talking about loving God came as easily as speaking of your love for the family dog.)

We remember the times in life we have strayed. Perhaps the practice of the Catholic Faith has become spotty at best. Consequently, we feel like hypocrites when we talk about God or the commandments or prayer. “If the guys at work heard me saying these things to my child, they’d howl with laughter.” So we console ourselves with the thought that at least I’m not being a phony . . . and we say nothing.

This won’t do. We need to be bigger than our embarrassment. There are some things “you just know in your bones”. Stay true to them. Things like: God has given me this child. I’ve experienced a love for them I never knew I was capable of. When I surrender to God’s plan for me (my here and now), I see how I can add goodness without embarrassment. I can witness to the God I KNOW FROM MY OWN EXPERIENCE.

Six simple things you can do with your child to witness to the faith God has given to you.

1. Send your child off to school, to bed, to sports, with the Sign of the Cross traced lightly on their forehead. “God bless you, and protect you. In the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit” is all you need to say.
2. Tell your child, “I’m praying for you.” You don’t know what this knowledge will do for your child.
3. Ask for your child’s prayers. Something like, “I need your help today. Would you pray that my meeting goes well today?” Kids want to help.
4. Tell your child when you’ve experienced God in your life. “I looked at you when you were born and I just knew God had blessed me.”
5. Share your embarrassment with your child. Something like, . . . “you know, I’m not the best at this but maybe TOGETHER we can learn about God.”
6. Bring your child to mass. There is no substitute for this.

Love will help you get over your embarrassment.

Fr. Tim